This film was in me until it forced its way out. While scanning dozens of undeveloped negatives from my childhood as part of a phenomenology-based project, I was struck by the sensoria and ephemeral elements of male adolescence that emanated from the images. Bikes, baseball, roughhousing. All laced with a homoerotic undertone. Filmmaking for me is often cathartic and necessary to understand my own emotions and perspectives.

In Our Secret Penthouse is a film rooted in discovering my own queerness. But it’s not about first love. It’s about discovering desire, and the limitations that come with it.